💫Inner child & work Coach
| Meditation Teacher | ENERGY Healer
Hello 🙂 I am Freena, living in Ubud in Bali.
This year, 2024, I gave myself this new name, Freena.
“Na” in Korean means “myself”.
FREENA has two meanings.
First, I free myself. Here “myself” means “True-Self or Highest-Self or Authentic Self”
Second, I am free from myself. “myself” here means the egoic identity.
When I gave myself this new name, this doesn’t mean that I don’t like the old version of myself.
I’ve healed my wounded inner child and been through inner integration process for about 10 years.
My given name in Korean is also amazing!
최지혜(Choi Ji Hye) means High Wisdom and Grace.
Now I am ready to shine my light and truth.✨💖
My Inner Integration Process
Who am I ?
2014, Quitting the job
After graduation from University, I worked for a company. I couldn’t fit in the hierarchy and I was suffering so hard.
That’s definitely not the life that I wanted.
In order to meet my parent and society’s expectation, I studied hard to go to the university. And then, in the university, I made lots of effort to work for a big company with good salary. And now, what’s the next? to getting married? and then, having children? and then working hard to buy a house?
I started to question “Who am I? Not who others want me to be?”
Travel around the world
2015 ~ 2019, Backpacking around the world for over 4years
To find what I want, I needed to see many different kinds of lifestyles and life paths
– 2015.02 ~ 2016.04 : Malaysia, Thailand, Laos, Cambodia
– 2015.05 ~ 2017.02 : Working Holiday in Australia
– 2017.03 ~ 2017.08 : New Zealand, Argentina, Chile, Peru, Bolivia, Colombia
– 2018.03 ~ 2019.02 : Working Holiday in New Zealand
2017, Skydiving
After my first try of skydiving when I was traveling in New Zealand, I fell in love with skydiving!
Since I was little young, I always dreamed of flying in the sky. If there was a incarnation, I wished to be born as a bird.
When I experienced skydiving, I realized I don’t need to wait for the next life to be born as a bird. I was able to fly as a human! I thought it was the answer to my question “who am I ?” (But it wasn’t in the end)
So I flew to Florida, USA to get a solo skydiving license.
2017 ~ 2018, Vipassana Meditation | My spiritual journey get started
2017.04 My first 10 days-Vipassana meditation course in New Zealand / My First Meditation Experience Ever!
2017.04 : Serving a 10 days-course in Argentina
2017.06 : Serving a 10 days-course in Peru
2018.01 : Sitting a 10 days-course in Korea
2018.12 : Sitting a 10 days-course in New Zealand
*Intense 100 hours meditation for one course
The power of Forgiveness | The depth of Love
One day after my first 10 days-Vipassana course, I had the most beautiful experience in my life.
Even I went to bed, I was in a meditative state. When I kept meditating, it felt as if energy like a large stone was tearing out of my chest. And I burst out crying. I didn’t get what was going on.
All of a sudden, I remembered my mom who cheated on my father and left my family when I was 12 years old. It hurt me so harsh. It had been over 15 years not thinking about her.
When the memory of the day my mother left came to mind, I started crying. After sobbing such with intensity, once I realized that before she was a mother, she was just a woman and a weak human being who could make mistakes, I was able to forgive her. I wished her to live happily and without feeling guilty for the rest of her life.
I realized that the pain my mom had caused to me when she left was the best gift of my life. This is because you can feel the power of forgiveness and the depth of love as much as you hated someone.
I had never expected I could forgive her. That miracle happened. It was God’s grace.
Dark night of Soul
A caterpillar' journey to become a butterfly | The painful process of a snake shedding its skin
2019, Back to Korea | Life was in downward spiral
After working-holiday in New Zealand, I flew to USA to follow my dream to become a skydiving instructor. I got a job at a skydiving center as a parachute packer to start with.
Unfortunately, it rained for over 5 months, which was not usual at all. Thanks to the rain(?), I wasn’t able to earn money and slowly used up all of my savings, which forced me to return to Korea with only $500 on my pocket.
As soon as I was back to Korea, I had to make money. I barely rented a small tiny little room to stay. I worked at a cafe in the morning and taught English at night. Soon after, Covid19 started. So I had to figure out how to teach English online.
2019, Voice from my Higher-Self
When my life was already in downward spiral, all of my relationships didn’t work out as well, not only romantic relationship but also ones with my parents and brother.
I felt abandoned from the entire universe. In my tiny little room, I cried and shouted into the air.
“If there is a God or Higher-self, how come do you abandon me like that?!”
And all of a sudden, I heard a solemn voice saying “Stop crying and clam down so that I can speak to you”. I stopped crying by surprise. Soon I heard the sound of my heartbeat as if I was wearing a stethoscope.
The sound of heartbeat was getting louder and louder. And the solemn voice said “Since this heart started to beat, I’ve never left you alone. Even when you don’t recognize me, I am always with you.”
Since this experience, I was guided to learn about Jesus.
2022, Depression / Counselling / Back to Meditation
2021, I met a guy whom I fell in love with so quickly and had a relationship for about 6 months. This breakup has affected my life so harsh. I suffered from depression.
I started psychological counselling and got back to meditation.
The counsellor reminded me of the breakup was related to my childhood and family relationship.
When she said “It’s okay to hate your parents”, this liberated a part of myself and I felt relieved.
I realized that I repressed my hatred, which made my anger become bigger and bigger and I became the anger itself.
2022, Inner Child Healing Work
One day, I was doing Mirror Gazing Meditation. I sat in front of the mirror and looked into my eyes.
I stimulated myself to feel the hidden emotions that I have repressed on my unconscious level.
“I was completely abandoned by my mother, emotionally abandoned by my father, unable to rely on my grandmother and older brother, and unable to share my pain with my friends. I feel abandoned by everyone!”
Suddenly another voice inside me shouted to me.
“Even if everyone had abandoned me, you shouldn’t have abandoned me!”
Transformation
2022, Deepening understanding of Buddha's teaching
2022.03 ~ 08 : Jungto Dharma School by Monk. Pomnyun
In this course, I was able to deepen my understanding of Buddhism. This course covered topics such as the life of Buddha, Buddhist doctrines (such as the Four Noble Truths and the Eightfold Path), mindfulness meditation techniques, and practical applications of Buddhist teachings in everyday life.
2023, USUI/HOLY FIRE Reiki Training with William
2023.09 : Usui/Holy Fire Reiki Lv.I&II
Reiki is a form of energy healing that originated in Japan in the early 20th century. The word “Reiki” means “spiritually guided universal life force energy”. Holy Fire Reiki is a modern form of Reiki energy healing that incorporates elements of the traditional Usui Reiki system with additional teachings and techniques.
One day, I learned about Reiki and felt a strong sense of synchronicity about Reiki training. During the training, in my vision, all the angels and ascended masters, especially Buddha and Jesus, who have guided my spiritual journey have blessed me.
2023, Strong Feeling to Move to Bali
2023.02 : One day, I had a strong feeling to move to Bali in a deep meditative state.
Even though I traveled around the world for over 4years, I’ve never been to Bali. I’ve been dreaming of living in Bali for many years. But this time, the feeling was so strong. I didn’t have any specific reason why I wanted or needed to move to Bali. So I applied for The Mediation Teacher Training for an excuse to go to Bali.
2023, 200Hrs Meditation Teacher Training with Punnu Wasu
2023.11 : Meditation Teacher Training for 21 days in Ubud, Bali
This intense training speeded up my spiritual journey to the next level. I was able to experience various types of meditation and yoga such as Active Consciousness Meditation, OSHO meditations, Sufi mediation, and many more. I loved the sound healings and his profound spiritual knowledge. Most important thing was this program fostered my spiritual awakening and self-awareness. And So Much FUN!!
From Day 2 of the training, I started to feel so much energy flow through my body. My body automatically danced and did some yoga practices I’ve never learned before. I felt like I was a puppet. I realized Shiva(the supreme God in Hinduism) took me over. It was just inner knowing.
Shiva help me to see the world through God’s perspective. Everything was perfect as it is imperfect. Everything was the manifestation and expression of God itself. I saw God’s face in every single person. They just forgot who they really are. They were shining like diamonds. Even the shit of the dog in the street was the God’s manifestation. Literally speaking, it was HOLY SHIT!
I realized the world is Maya(hologram or illusion). The outer world is the reflection of my inner state. Every phenomenon is the mirror of my inner mind. Now, whenever something happens, I go into myself and get a message from it.
After this HOLY EXPERIENCE, I thanked to Shiva. He said “I called you to come to Bali.
2024, Closing Old Cycle | Past Life Karma Clearing
2024.01 : 10 days-Vipassana Meditation course in Malaysia
After the Meditation Teacher Training, a short and intense love relationship made me understand that our actions in past lives could influence our present circumstances and experiences.
Soon after the breakup, I went for another 10 days-Vipassana course. This helped me to identify and resolve the unresolved karmic patterns or energetic imbalances originating from past lives, not only this life time.
I was able to aware and heal my deepest root wounds, unhealthy attachment pattern, and imbalanced feminine & masculine energies within myself. This awareness helped me to close the old karmic cycle and open a new chapter of my life.
I found the answer to "Who AM I ?"
I AM LIGHT AND LOVE | I AM AWARENESS | I AM CONSCIOUSNESS.
One day, sitting in front of the mirror, I saw the entire universe in my eyes. I realized that I created this universe. I AM bigger than the universe.
I felt like I should close these eyes, not only the physical eyes but also so-called third eye and I closed all the eyes and kept silence.
I heard a voice saying “I AM you. You are me. And what you hear now is God’s voice, holy spirit. God is Love itself that cannot be described in any words. Just feel this.” All of a sudden, I felt so light and comfortable, as if I were a cloud.
The solemn voice said “This Love you are feeling now is God, which is your original nature. If you don’t forget this, you are always in heaven with a body or without a body, wherever you are, whatever you do.”
Even though my eyes were closed, the golden light grew stronger and brighter. It was as dazzling as a thousand suns shining at the same time. I was awed by the bright light and closed my eyes tighter.
I realized that individual self must disappear in order to melt into the light and nothing is important but this great Love and I don’t need anything or to do anything. The only thing God wants from me is to enjoy my life sharing this great Love and find something that I can fall in love.